When we face obstacles and setbacks while pursuing our dreams, many of us experience anxieties and fears. We become filled with self-doubt and we question the viability of what we're doing.
Oftentimes, this leads to us becoming less motivated, less proactive and less likely to go the distance. This is a critical mistake. If our goal is success, we cannot afford to let setbacks influence us to lose our optimism, our passion, our commitment and our focus.
On the contrary, the setback is something that we can use to our benefit, to increase our resolve, to make our product or service better, and to bring us closer to success than we ever might have gotten had we not faced the setback in the first place.
Everyone on the planet will have to go through set-backs and obstacles in their lives. Some people will have more severe challenges than others. However, the one who can go grow from and use their set-backs and obstacles, will always succeed. Obstacles can come in many forms; losing a game, failing a test, getting ill, or losing people we love.
Here are a few stories of great athletes who overcame their set-backs and obstacles:
Creating Success Despite Obstacles And Setbacks
How do we do this?
The Secret To Success
Instead of allowing ourselves to become depressed and defeated, we remind ourselves that, "When the going gets tough, the tough get going." And then we mobilize ourselves to seek advice and guidance from our mentors, to expand our network, to push harder and stronger, and to leave no stone unturned.
We use the setback to renew our commitment to success and to inspire us to be more resourceful, more inventive, more creative, more effective and more efficient.
We use the setback to review our product and our business plan. If we discover a mistake that we made, we correct the mistake and press forward. If we discover an insufficiency that hadn't occurred to us before, we look at the situation from other perspectives, we think outside of the box, and we brainstorm solutions that are unique and innovative.
We use the setback to re-format and/or polish our presentation, and to tighten our sales pitch until it clearly reflects benefits and advantages over other products and services.
Above all else, we use the setback to remind ourselves of the many people who, despite having had setbacks, losses, and failures, eventually succeeded, many beyond their wildest expectations. And we remind ourselves that the reason they succeeded is because they didn't give up. They didn't lose faith in themselves or their vision.
Bottom line: When confronted with a setback, we don't give it the power to derail us. We use it to remind ourselves that we are worthy, we are good enough, we deserve success and prosperity, and that we will get it if we persist and persevere.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
When we are going through pain and suffering, we often feel that no one else is living with the set-backs and are going through the obstacles that face us. This is not true. We may not know them, but everyone has their problems. The key is that some people choose to change their attitudes and simply deal with their challenges like the athletes in this chapter. It's important to acknowledge your feelings, take time to grieve over a situation, then move on. Start by asking yourself, "How can I make the best out of this situation?" The answer will come to you.
Set-backs and obstacles can make you stronger.
No matter what challenge you face, big or small, you can still win.
Inside each of us is greatness.
Never say never.
There is always someone going through more pain and suffering than you
Your set-backs and obstacles can make you a better person.
Choose to learn from these challenges.
Ask yourself how you can move on.
Never, ever give up.
Today, I will make the best of this situation.
Today, I am learning from these challenges.
Today, I am becoming stronger and better.
Today, I am being led to solutions to my challenges.
“Breakdowns can create breakthroughs. Things fall apart so things can fall together.” Unknown.
Just when I thought I was ready to get some of my ideas into motion and action, I have a setback.
Previously setbacks involved finances (unexpected bills, for example), time delays, and an unresponsive partner or friend when I wanted to make changes.
My current setback came in the form of a massive health scare.
When I’ve gotten over some fear and self-sabotage, and I feel like I’m finally ready to take action, it always brings up things for me.
At that moment of action, when all my hard work starts to pay off, my little voice creeps in to stop me from moving forward. It creates doubt and makes me question my decisions.
It feels like I’m going to fall or rather jump off a cliff. But I know I need to get out of my comfort zone and take that leap. I also know, on some level, that these setbacks show me how close I am to achieving my dreams, if only I can find the faith to push through them.
Still, this setback is extreme, even for me!
I am writing this from a hospital. After I wrote my goals for the next six months, and got ready for an action-packed week ahead, I had an “attack” and was immediately rushed to hospital via ambulance.
Long story short, they found I have a pancreas and liver disease and I needed urgent life-saving surgery. I am now needing to heal from this and will probably need more surgery in six weeks time (although I am researching other natural alternatives too).
I’m a girl who drinks green smoothies every day, I don’t eat red meat or drink alcohol, and I’m certainly not overweight or unhealthy, yet I am in this health challenge.
As I write this with tears, I realize that facing and dealing with setbacks is a part of life for all of us. And sometimes when we think we’re ready to unleash on the world, the universe has other plans!
I’ve learned that we can choose to find something good in our setbacks. It all depends on what we want to take from then.
If you’re dealing with a setback too:
No one is immune to setbacks. If you have one, recognize the problem. By doing this you can start the process of transformation, for it is on the other side of the setback that we realize we are not going to be the same person we were before. We are going to be wiser, stronger, and better for it.
Like nature and the seasons, the caterpillar and the butterfly, the tadpole and the frog, there’s no turning back, there’s no putting our head in the sand to pretend it isn’t happening. Acknowledge that through the tough times, the miracles of transformation happen, and we can flourish on the other side.
We are capable of doing amazing things and even more if we can grow through our challenges.
Things happen for no obvious reason sometimes. Exploring the way forward is much healthier than trying to blame someone or something for a setback that is irreversible.
Access your spirituality.
Spirituality can sustain us in times of uncertainty and difficulty. When we feel like we don’t have the physical, mental, or emotional strength to pull through, our faith in something more—whatever that may be—gives us the energy we need to keep going.
Spirituality reminds us that we are a gift, and have gifts to offer the world. Our job right now is to discover these gifts and to remove the setbacks so we can give them to others in the future.
Focusing on our spirituality allows us to see beyond this setback and find a purpose for it.
Give yourself time.
Just as we need to allow time for wounds and broken hearts to mend, we need to allow ourselves time to overcome our setbacks. Impatience only makes them harder and longer than they need to be.
We are in such a hurry to fix our problems and move on; usually this impatience is a pattern that overflows into other areas of our life.
I am terribly guilty of impatience, and the only solution I have found is focusing on and enjoying other things while allowing a setback to be resolved in its own time. I try to remember what really matters. I think back to happy memories and keep faith that after this setback I will be where I want to be.
It serves no purpose to dwell on a problem. Allow the movement of time to push you through it. Time does heal!
Step out of your comfort zone.
This is what I am doing now confronting and staring a setback in the face, and sharing it honestly to say, “Hey this is where I’m at.” This type of openness has enormous power. We can learn so much from other people who are dealing with their own challenges, but we have to share our own to do it.
I’m dealing with a health challenge now, but I am not a victim. Setbacks can be overcome even sickness.
I know I will be in a better situation on the other side of this, especially if I hold onto my faith and joy. I am confident I can beat this!
Yes we are all going to deal with setbacks in life, but we can overcome them if we see them as part of a bigger life picture, and commit to seeing them through from start to finish. Remember that this setback won’t stop you from being who you want to be and doing what you want to do.
Life is often a very bumpy ride full of ups and downs along the way. A lot of people have this idea that things should always be perfect and fault-free. If you share this point of view then the message I have for you is: stop being unrealistic. Setting goals and expecting the best of yourself is very important, but you should also accept setbacks along the way.
A primary cause of goal failure, is a person's inability to cope with setbacks. This can be explained by the individual's lack of preparation in anticipating both the nature and the treatment of a setback. It is important to always take the long-term view in life; accept that there are going to be setbacks and that change comes from learning.
You need to remember that change requires effort and can take a lot more than you think. Shaping the life you want is worth the investment so think about the resources, especially the time that you are putting into your change programme. An effort to get the job done by taking short cuts usually results in it actually taking longer.
You need to take time thinking through the best methods that work for you. For example, let's say your goal is to lose weight; rather than picking the latest fad, you should select a regime that suits you. Remember, though, not to be too stubborn if things do not work out; you should be flexible and adaptable to the situation.
Temptation is another key ingredient in causing a setback, and even the best of us can succumb to it. So avoid actions, no matter how small, that may jeopardise your goals, such as keeping tempting foods in the house when you are trying to lose weight!
Ever thought why people say that people those who pass their driving test on the second time around make better drivers than first-time passers? The answer is, of course, because the people who fail it the first time have a chance to learn from their mistakes and come back even stronger than before. If you are training for a race, you don't expect to make your best time on your first go. The same mindset we have used in these examples needs to be deployed in all of your goals.
Coping With Obstacles
The better prepared you are, the more ready you are to cope with obstacles. However, sometimes circumstances can be so unexpected that they catch us completely by surprise. The journey to change isn't a straight line. You may encounter surprises and,lose your bearings and suddenly find you are back to square one again. These situations may seem frustrating at first, but they are all very useful. When we experience anything in life, we learn an incredible amount. The more we learn from life, we become more knowledgeable of our emotional state.
Keep Your Emotions In Check
Keeping your emotional state in check is very important because of the role emotions play in our mental health. Sometimes we need to retreat and recuperate from a bad series of events. Perhaps the struggle has got to us, or maybe an upsetting life experience has thrown you off balance a little. Whatever the reason, you must anticipate that you need to let yourself off the hook from time to time. We all need time to recharge and gather strength for the next stage of our journey.
Keep an open mind and stay curious at all times. If you suffer a lapse, it does not mean you have failed; it simply means you need some time to reflect and make some adjustments. Keep a fresh and healthy perspective on all of your life experiences that will allow you to step beyond feeling aggrieved with yourself.
Remember that Mistakes are the way that we learn and find out about the world. If there were no mistakes we would not have many of the innovations we take for granted today, or anything that has made our life easier in the modern world,. Trial and error is the process by which we learn as human beings. Basically, the only way we can figure out how to get something to work is to know what things will prevent it from happening. Accept that mistakes will happen, learn from them and them make sure they are not repeated.
Stop getting in your own way
The only thing stopping us achieving the success we want is ourselves. This is great news. The reason it is great news is because changing ourselves to get out of our own way is totally within our control. So, are you willing and ready to get out of your own way and stop being the obstacle to your Business Success and Lifestyle Freedom? If you are, here are two key areas to focus on:
Mindset. Your mindset is creating the results you are currently experiencing. I have said it before but it is worth saying again, the reason upgrading your mindet is so vital is this:
Mindset creates thought patterns – thought patterns create feelings – feelings create behaviour/actions – actions create results.
The same mindset that created your current situation won’t get you out of it. It is time to upgrade your mindset
Tip: start researching and learning about how to create a real kick ass success mindset. Seek out good quality resources and people to learn from.
You can’t expect to get the results of a successful business owner unless you are behaving, making decisions and running your business as successful business owners do.
Tip: as with mindset, get out there and research and learn what successful business owners do that unsuccessful ones don’t. Also, you become what you surround yourself with so be careful who you let into your business circle. Avoid like the plague.
This is the last day in the 5 days to Change for Success series. For me, today’s is the most important. You can do all the other tasks and activities we have talked about but if you don’t step up to this one you will always be capping the level of success you can achieve.
We eventually found a good coach company that was cheap, even if it did mean Davy would have to endure a 26hr coach journey. In the end, we got our first visit together! It only lasted 6 days and we were only able to stay in the same hotel room together for one of those nights. However, after everything we went through to get there, it was definitely worth the whole year waiting.
So what would be our five top tips to help with those big giant mean walls getting in the way of seeing each other?
Don’t let it get between you
There may be many miles between you and your significant other right now, but it doesn’t have to get between you. Yes, a setback is tough to deal with but it isn’t the end of the world or your relationship. You can always find another way around the problem.
If it is a money issue that makes your visit not able to happen then talk it out. Discuss other ways you could do to make it happen. If one of you needs to take extra shifts at work to be able to make ends meet then the other will have to understand. It may mean slightly less talking but it’ll be worth it when you finally get to hold each other again.
Try not to put the blame on one person
A relationship is a collaborative effort. Both of you need to contribute in order for it to make it work. If one of you starts to put all the pressure on your other half because they’re the one coming over, then you happen to have a setback, and you blame them for it – then it’s probably not going to work out.
You are two equals. There is no hierarchy in a relationship. Moreover, remember how you’d feel if you were being blamed for something that was out of your hands even though you tried your hardest to make the visit happen? You can always try again so try not to make your S/O feel like they are to blame.
Planning is definitely key. Make sure you cover all the bases you need. How much will things cost? Will you need to pay for accommodation as well as food? Are you both going to pay towards the cost of the visit or is it one sided? Have you checked the best way to travel? What will you be doing during your visit? Will you need to pay to go out to places together?
These are all important questions you need to ask each other before you start considering booking. If you iron out all the details then it leaves less room for things to go wrong.
Distract yourself from it
Sometimes all you need is just to have fun. If things are getting too tense between you then find other things to do. Watch a movie online together, read a book or perhaps listen to cheesy love songs together. Just anything that will distract you temporarily until things can be sorted out.
Most of all: enjoy being together in the end. This one is self-explanatory. Just enjoy being in each others company. You definitely deserve it!
Life is always going to throw obstacles in your path each day – personally and professionally. Many will cause little or no interruption or stoppage.
However, there will be some obstacles and that cannot be overcome as easily and might bring you and your team to a stop on the road to progress. Don’t feel you’ve failed because of these setbacks. Here are key steps you can use to deal with them in order to move forward successfully.
Acknowledge the Setback Honestly
The worst thing that you can do when you are going through some sort of setback is deny that you are actually going through one. Acknowledge the setback honestly and openly to your team; do not conceal back this information to preserve the façade of a flawless track record. Setbacks are going to happen, but they need to be properly acknowledged in order to be resolved.
Analyze the Resulting Damage
After honestly acknowledging the setback, the next step is to analyze the damage that resulted from it. Initially, it is easy to assume that everything is ruined and that there is no way that the damage can possibly be repaired. The good news is that an honest examination will often show that it is not as bad you as thought and there is, in fact, room for correction and improvement.
Develop a Detailed Plan of Action
Since you are now able to identify the areas you can address in order to turn your past setback into a future comeback, the next step for you to take now is to develop a detailed action plan that maps out the steps that need to be taken. This plan needs to repair any damage and overcome the obstacle or setback in your way.
Share The Action Plan with Your Team
Make sure everyone on your team is informed. They need to be aware that there was a problem that occurred, the damage that resulted from those occurrences and, more importantly, the plan of action necessary to move on. Their input is valuable, so be willing to accept different suggestions from your team that could enhance the quality and overall effectiveness of your action plan.
Work with Your Team to Put That Plan into Action
The final step is to get to work on achieving the objectives and goals that were specified in detail through your plan. Keep in mind that a full recovery may take some time; nothing can get done overnight. Even so, you still want to check for progress and monitor the performance of your team as you work together as a united force to continue to move forward despite the setbacks you’ve encountered.
Prepare to Learn
Preparation is key to achieving success in business. As a business owner, you have goals of what you want your business to achieve, and how you will implement your action plan. Unfortunately, just like Olympians, life doesn’t always go as planned – no matter how much experience (or training) you have.
Setbacks do occur. When they do, are you open to the feedback they provide? Are you ready to learn new methods, skills or information? When I work with my clients, we use these times to dig deep and explore what happened, what factors influenced the outcome and we identify the changes and opportunities that are needed to move forward once again. When you are open to learning from your set-backs, another world opens to you.
The only source of knowledge is experience. Albert Einstein
After learning from your set-backs, it’s time to put the knowledge you gained to work for you. As Mark Twain said,
If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you always got.
So what changes are necessary to get a different result?
Many times, the changes we need to make are minor yet have a significant impact on the outcome. If your marketing collateral isn’t attracting your ideal client, rewording your messages can shift who connects with you and your product/service. Are you responding to requests in a timely manner? If not, is it time to hire an assistant? Is cash flow preventing you from taking advantage of opportunities? How can you speed up account receivables so you can leverage this income to expand your business?
Business happens at a fast pace. You need to be able to shift gears quickly. This entails making quick decisions, communicating changes to others effectively and leading the way. If you aren’t leading your business, who is?
Setbacks can take the wind out of your sails but this is the time when you have to push back. Your goals, original and revised action plans, and a positive mindset plus determination to succeed are critical components in the momentum shift.
Business systems are another fundamental component. Do you have business systems that allow you, and your team, to effectively and efficiently be creative, perform tasks, implement changes, respond to customers or your environment? Are these systems expandable? If you want faster results, don’t walk your path alone. The proverb,
Many minds make light work
reinforces the value of connecting with others in the pursuit of your goals. Whether you have a mentor, business coach, peer mentor group or a team in your business who are all aligned on your success, you will be better prepared to create, implement, react to the ups and downs of your business.